Old Soul

/ WriterlySam
Biltmore Wisteria

Wisteria
Biltmore Estate

My 8 sentence excerpt for Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday. Click on over to these talented writers and preview some amazing stories!

Inspiring Soundtrack: Hans Zimmer – Inception – Time

I first met Frederick under the fragrant canopy of a lone wisteria tree that thrived with wild abandon amidst the ruins of a sprawling country estate. He was the grand architect of its gardens, long before the landscape was suddenly, irreparably erased.

Through his stories, I can picture the vibrant colors of the roses, inhale the sweet aroma of azaleas, feel the velvety lambs ears and taste the tangy wild raspberries nestled in earthy greens. I can almost hear the chatter of squirrels in phantom trees and the echoes of songbirds in ashen skies, losing myself in a time when life thrived here in abundance…now, all that remains is the memory.

He has built me a new world, a better world, from the remnants of his.

Through him, I’ve learned to coax new life out of the reluctant soil – an endangered survival skill lost over a century ago. Though I’ve shared this knowledge with the others, I dare not speak of him, not when his name and likeness haunts the ancient, crumbling halls of our new home.

The closest I’ve come to living is through the words of a ghost.

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© 2013 Samantha Redstreake Geary

I appreciate feedback, so comment, critique or just banter to your heart’s content! Should you leave a really awesome comment, I may share my fair-trade, shade-grown, bird-sanctuary, organic coffee with you:) Or, if you leave a link to your site, I can just pop in and say something witty after polishing off a cup or two!

37 thoughts on “Old Soul”

  4. I agree, strong imagery. I also sense the narrator’s sadness. So you’ve got some interesting things going on in a short space, and that’s a good thing 🙂

    One suggestion: that last line carries a lot of weight, and I think it would be more effective if you drop the comma. That would allow it to flow more easily and would increase its dramatic effect. IMHO.

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  12. This was so captivating! Wonderful writing, love the dark, haunting feel to it. This could easily be part of a much longer piece! Thanks for stopping by my site and for the follow. I’m happy to follow you back. (:

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    • I appreciate that John! I wanted the ghost of Frederick Law Olmstead (architect of the Biltmore’s 125,000-acre estate and creator of New York’s Central Park ) to unlock her imagination by regaling her with stories from “his” time, thus helping her paint a picture of what used to be and enabling her to envision what could be:)

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  20. This is so wonderfully real–every sense is brought to life. Fantastic! Certainly the epitome of “show, don’t tell.” We can hear, see, feel, taste….nicely done!

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